How Screwed Are They, Really? is an ongoing series of blog posts organized as if an edutainment TV series, put out by Dozerfleet Studios and Dozerfleet Literature primarily on GirlsAskGuys as a myTake series. The first "episode" technically was a truncated one that ran on DeviantArt, but kick-started the series and allowed for it to be transferred over to GirlsAskGuys.
Each episode examines a film or TV hero or team of heroes that have had unrealistic happy endings, and dissects their actions to ascertain what would happen if they were pursued by a malicious and nigh-omniscient prosecutor eager to press charges on them. The series tries to take things from a prosecutor's point of view to show how easy (or hard) it would be to put even heroes in jail for their on-screen actions if only the evidence were known to such a prosecutor. The series combines brutal deconstruction with legal humor.
Episodes and content
The first episode was about Semaphore - as well as her counterpart in the original Prodigalverse. It was decided that - realistically - her role in the crash should have earned her only one year in a county jail - not three years in a prison for abnormals.
The second episode took a look at the film Tomorrowland - as well as its feminine protagonist. It was concluded that, far from the happy ending she gets, she more realistically would have found herself in Guantanamo for all the stunts she is seen pulling.
Big Hero 6
It was concluded in this episode that Hiro and Callaghan both might be either dead or extremely old-aged before they ever got out of prison, if a nigh-omniscient prosecutor got his hands on both of them. Baymax would have been reprogrammed to forget everyone, and would have been forced to spend the rest of his days working in a hospital. The others would have probably received 5-6 years in prison for various reasons. GoGo would turn out the worst upon release - a nod to her less-than-kosher business dealings in the comics.
The Power Rangers
This episode struggled to find anything to pin on any of the Rangers, as that show's writers seem to go out of their way to rarely ever show the Rangers doing anything illegal (outside Rangers under evil spells helping destroy buildings.) With so little to focus on in terms of Rangers breaking laws, the focus instead shifted to times that the villains could have easily defeated them - and didn't.
In "Foul Play in the Sky," Kimberly was forced to fly the plane herself. She seemed clueless how to fly a plane - even though her Pterodactyl Zord is sort of a plane and she can fly that with no trouble. This little gap in logic aside, Rita could have simply shot the plane out of the sky - or had Goldar steal nuclear codes or seize control of SDI in order to shoot the plane down. Kimberly would have been dead to rights. Instead, this opportunity was outright ignored.
Rita also fails to consider the possibility of hiring a lawyer under her spell to use the Rangers' secret identities against them. It wouldn't be too hard to press charges on them. And by getting human courts to do the job, the Rangers would have had a harder time simply blowing off the implications than if they were tried on another planet by aliens. This plan (almost) worked for Megatron in the original Transformers TV series. It seems strange that classic Power Rangers was so averse to considering the possibility of it.
During "The Mutiny," Billy left his garage door wide open, giving Zedd ample opportunity to spy on him and figure out that he was trying to build a device to regain control of the T-Rex and Dragon Zords. Simply sending a mind-controlled human sniper to assassinate Billy and Trini would have solved a lot of Zedd's problems - with a single bullet, if timed right. Instead, he blows off what the two of them are doing as "it probably won't matter." This single act of arrogance proves he is almost as stupid as Rita.
As the Time Force Rangers were clearly squatting in that clock tower, the next section examines whether or not they legally would have been able to get away with it.
The episode then skips ahead to Dino Thunder. The Rangers numerous times do things that could conceivably get them in trouble with the law, yet it is easily handwaved away time and again by the script. As Elsa defects to the Rangers' side at the end of that season, it's examined how she could have been a villain for so long - and yet, nobody goes after her once she is cured, in spite the evidence of her past crimes. Her willingness to leave so many things to chance is also examined.
The episode concludes that the Power Rangers are so squeaky-clean most of the time, it's very hard to find any legal dirt on them that would stick - even in the Orange is the New Black universe!
Title card characters
The following characters feature in the title card:
- Emily Barnes from Camelorum Adventures
- Tommy Oliver from Power Rangers
- Ruby Rose from RWBY
- Anita Hallot from Camelorum Adventures
- Hiro Himada and GoGo Tomago from Big Hero 6
- The 1987 Ninja Turtles
Inspiration for this series came in 2015, after the Dozerfleet founder went with some siblings to see Disney's Tomorrowland film - and walked out unimpressed. Around this same time, there were some questions about whether or not every character in Camelorum Adventures was receiving a sentence that was either fair or realistic. From there, the question expanded to: "Look at all these other characters, and everything they did that either is or ought to be illegal today! How screwed would they be, if the law saw their every move?"
Further re-watchings of Big Hero 6 only reinforced this question. On May 12th of 2016, this resulted in the first episode as a journal entry on DeviantArt. Between May and September of that year, it received 295 views - but no replies. The second episode was submitted in June of that year, and received two comments. A third episode got more interaction from viewers on GirlsAskGuys, revealing that site to be the one best suited for the series' format and content.
On September 10th of 2016, it was asked on GirlsAskGuys what viewers would like to see for a future episode. The most immediate response was that the viewers didn't care who was examined before the show's imaginary jury. What did matter, was that the show should be turned into a series of YouTube videos - becoming a web series proper. This was considered immediately thereafter, though the transition remains pending.