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"The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre" is a song from the Every Ape and His Brother collection Morbid! The Horrendous Hobo!!!. It is a parody of Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss' song "Whiskey Lullaby."

Overview

This song was written first in early 2006 because of the ease of switching the word "trigger" with "Tigger" in the chorus.

Instead of a song about cheating, despair, guilt, and suicide; the parody is about two psychopaths, a man and a woman, who invade the Hundred-Acre Wood, and systematically murder Winnie-the-Pooh and all of the Pooh characters that were created by AA Milne.

They find that somehow, because Gopher was the idea of Walt Disney rather than AA Milne, that Gopher is immortal and invincible. They brutally massacre everything except for Gopher, since their bullets simply go around him rather than piercing him. He laughs at them and taunts them, hopping around like a crack-high Bugs Bunny. In the end, they reside in a mental institution, laughing about how they killed almost everyone.

History

Concept

The idea lay latent until the autumn of 2006, when it was developed further into a song and was submitted to AmIRight's website. After that, the song was then submitted to DozerfleetWiki 1 first as an article on February 12th of 2007 at 11:00 PM EST.[1]

Reception

Out of five votes, the song received an average of 3-1/5 stars out of 5 for pacing and a solid 4 out of 5 for humor value. The overall rating average was 3-3/5 out of 5. [2]

Comment Reviews

"The OS is a favorite of mine...and [the] pacing matches very well... ...[And] over all, it's pretty solid...I can't decide how I feel about it over all...it's SO morbid! (Who could kill little Roo?) But at the same time, well done..." - Arwen [3]

"I like sick humor as much as the next guy. I'll take Arwen's word for the pacing and give it a 555 for the huevos of you to kill off such a vaunted and beloved bit of our childhood." - Agrimorfee [4]

"My brother and I were laughing so hard that we couldn't breathe. It was sick, but it was hilarious! I loved it!" - Jessie W. [5]

Lyrics

* * *The following is a list of lyrics to a song. * * *
"The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre"

Intro

[Instrumental opening]

First verse

We took them out! / Like the burning end of a cannon in a war! /
Holes in you heart! / Those beasts you never really will forget... /

We watched them as they died away, / a little at a time. /
But they never did die fast enough; / to ease our stressed out minds... / Until tonight!!! /

First chorus

We shoved a rifle through the bush / and murdered Tigger! /
And nuked Eeyore into a memory! /

Pooh died quick; / but Rabbit's death was sicker... /
Than us blasting Piglet into smithereens! /

The only one to live was that darn Gopher! /
But after all, / He ain't in the book you've heard! /

And so we write to you from in a deer blind... /
Of the Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre... /

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /

Second verse

Then Roo was killed. /
That left Kanga wishing she could kill herself! /

Too bad; we did! /
For minutes long, the blood sprang from her neck! /

We watched them as they died away, / a little at a time! /
But they never did die fast enough; / to ease our stressed out minds... / Until tonight!!! /

Second chorus

We took some / napalm to the field, / and roasted Tigger! /
Then reduced Owl to a memory! /

Chris died quick. / The Hefalumps were sicker... /
Than the strength we had / to scorch their intestines! /

The only one to live was that darn Gopher! /
Slippery enough, / that little terd! /

And so we write to you / from the funny farm... /
Of the Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre! /

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! /
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! /

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /

[Instrumental Break]

Finale evil laughing

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! /


Lyrics © 2012 Dozerfleet Records.

References

  1. "History Page for The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre." DozerfleetWiki 1. Dozerfleet Productions. February 11th, 2007. 11:00 PM EST.
  2. "The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre." AmIRight.
  3. Arwen, Agrimorfee, Jessie W. "The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre." (Comments). AmIRight.
  4. Arwen, Agrimorfee, Jessie W. "The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre." (Comments). AmIRight.
  5. Arwen, Agrimorfee, Jessie W. "The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre." (Comments). AmIRight.
MorbidCover
Morbid! The Horrendous Hobo!!! (2007)
# Title
1 The Only Resort
2 Why She Said "Seven Days"
3 Phantasmic
4 Doughboy
5 Ridiculous
6 Lower!!!
7 They'll Claw You Open
8 The Hundred-Acre Woodland Massacre
9 This Feels Obscene, It's an Earthquake
10 Let the Elements Shine Down